News came about a new monastery. It was founded by nuns from another monastery.
There were six in the community and could use more members.
It was a door opening for me, an opportunity for me to ask for a transfer.
The monastery came from French communities.
The nuns held it to be progressive, hence not as authentic as Spanish communities.
It came to me, I could go there.
They needed more personnel and my life with this monastery has become impossible.
I could also prove for myself that a monastery updated according to Vatican Second, could be as genuine.
It takes a unanimous vote from the community for me to get transferred.
I knew though held as bad, there were nuns who would not want to see me leave.
I knew also Mother Margaret held great sway over the community.
All I had to do was get her to want me to leave and she would convince the nuns to let me go.
And I know just how to get her to want me to leave.
I told her, “The newcomers are restless. You know what will happen if I stay here. I will lead them in a revolt.”
That was enough for her.
Just as I thought, she talked the entire community into letting me go.
The vote was unanimous.
I remember little about leaving this community I was a member of for ten years.
Mother Therese was very sad, I was her spiritual daughter.
She was the Novice Mistress when I entered.
I saw the silent grief on Sister Pilar’s face.
If I had any reservation leaving that community, it was my family.
The other monastery was much further.
They would not be as likely to visit me there.
But that was not something I could take into consideration.
I knew I could no longer stay with the community.
Not when I drove things as far as I did.
Engaged in the fight over the constitutions,
I had felt a hero and believed the Carmelite Fathers in Rome likely hail me as one.
It fed my ego no end, thinking about it.
Later, it came to me, more likely, they had to think this nun was crazy,
to go against an intransigent group of nuns in this manner.
They likely thought the same, that my days there were numbered.
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