Late afternoon, I went for meditation.
No sooner did I get into it than a strong energy took over me.
I stayed with it, seeking neither to see nor experience anything.
Surrendering, staying in a detached state of being.
It was very gripping.
I kept feeling something was going to happen.
The energy would increase some and then lessen.
Increase and lessen.
All the while I felt gripped by this energy and force.
Two hours into it, I felt I had to come out of it.
I allowed myself to see.
I saw the ambient clearing.
I saw a bed of white clouds and Jesus in the middle of it.
Standing to the left of me.
I heard him say, "Take care of my flock."
Me? I fought against being a teacher in any way.
And here he is asking me to take care of his flock?
He assured me he is with me and will be with me till the end of days.
I only need to give my consent.
I told him, on one condition. that he gives me humility together with it.
I do not want to lose my soul.
Pride enters in and I will lose my soul.
He told me he has been with me since I was a child.
I saw evenings where I knelt at a table and prayed to him.
At one point, I heard, "Mystical teachings of Jesus."
He told me, "you often recite the words, you in me, I in you and we in the father.
Where do you think the words come from? From me."
I have always loved those words of St John the apostle.
I came out of the meditation and gave thanks to him.
I will let Jesus lead the way and guide me.
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